I Need Religion

I am thinking about starting a new religion. It is not that the world needs another faith but maybe it needs one that is more pertinent to the average woman. There are faiths that promote women's place in the home, where men meet in huge auditoriums and bond over being the head of the household. There are faiths that promote storage of food...do I need more food? There are churches that have diet groups and there are faiths where you, as a woman may "service" your man and the preacher in order to make your way to heaven.

I have in the last month had several retail experiences where the item I wanted to buy was not on the shelf. The reason being the state of the economy. Stores just can't afford to keep stock...so they only buy a limited amount and when it runs out...well siyanara. What if there were no shoes in stock!!!!!!!! I do not know a single woman, whether she be chic, hippie, mom type or business woman that does not stop to at least look at shoes. The reason the shoes are near the front door of a store is because you can stop a woman in her tracks, given the right kind of shoe. You do not find stores that sells just blouses or just pants, but you do find stores that sell just shoes. So I am thinking in order to preserve the shoe I will become high priestess of a new religion that will stock pile shoes in case of a shortage. Woman from around the nation could come and pick out shoes if they are low on cash or there are no shoes available in their area.

Oh well...just dreaming cause my budget has a lock on it and the store clerks are tired of cleaning my drool off their latest shoe inventory.