Phenomenal Woman

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion

model's size.

But when I start to tell them,

They think I'm telling lies.

I say,

It's in the reach of my arms

The span of my hips,

The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.

I'm a woman

Phenomenally,

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

Maya Angelou

I find that the time I spend with women is one of adventure.  Add a man to the mix and the adventure gets kicked up a notch.  When women get together and they come with open hearts, it is amazing what can happen.  The world as we know it expands with the female capacity to listen, feel and share.  

I find I am a much better friend and wife to my husband because I feel safe to bring my complete female energy to the relationship.  He is not threatened by the female energy but flexes and absorbs the energy.

It is in relationship with women that I learn about myself and what I am willing to share, that makes me a better person.

The Soul Of A Dog

I am reading a book by the author Jon Katz named, "The Soul of a Dog."  It is a wonderful peek into the lives of the animals that share his home and farm.  In one chapter he talks about Elvis, a steer who has become an unlikely pet.  In a study done at one of the local university vet programs the professor talked about the possible evolutionary process that might be occuring when "man" makes a non-human a pet.

So, you ask what does this have to do with Julie's dog Nala?  Well according to this professor the tendency for humans is to attach our own thought processes and emotions to animals.  It is in this way that we feel love.  When we believe that our animals feel the same way we do, have the same responses to relationships and love...then to have the animals in our lives give us unconditional love is soooo wonderful.  We are healthier, happier, deal with stress better and are more motivated. 

Now we come to Elivs, the steer.  The 2 other steers on the farm totally ignore Jon.  They have no relationship with humans, they do not get the cause and effect of hay and human.  But, Elvis does.  It might be that Jon saw something different in Elvis and so began to treat him differently...or it may be that Elvis was different.  What ever the reason Elvis looks for Jon, calls to him when he wants something to eat...according to the professor this is how animals move up the evolutionary chain.  Elvis's offspring may also have relationships with humans.

There is one bear who has been able to open every single bear proof garbage container.  The container company acutally takes their latest and greatest bear proof can to this particular park to have it tested and so far...this one bear, can open them all.  Now they are watching to see if her off spring will be able to accomplish the feat.  She and potentially her cubs are moving up the evolutionary steps of bears.

Oh yeah...Julie's dog Nala.  Does the photo not speak for itself.  Nala has moved up her families evolutionary chain.  A dog who no longer sleeps on the floor (there are millions of dogs who have already evolved to bed sleepers) next she will ask for the remote control and breakfast in bed! (you can tell she is already dreaming it!)

The View

Keeping focused on the view will make your life richer than focusing on the limitations.  It is easier to keep the limitations in the fore front because they usually are easier to understand.  Concrete.  Limited.  Defined. But if you accept the outline as all there is, the possibilites are lost.

Yesterday while walking with a friend she said, "If I live to 85 years old, I only have 30 more summers to enjoy, 30 more springs to enjoy the Irises."  It was stunning in it's limitation.  It was defined.  But...it got me thinking.  Can I see that possibility?  No. 

Mainly because I don't know how many summers or springs I have and there is so much that can fill a year, month, week, day, hour, minute and second.  I don't want to miss a second of shear ectasy. 

I believe that the single span of time that it took to think...I have only 30 more summers...may have caused me to miss a moment of shear bliss!

Patients or Patience

My career is perfect for me.  I am paid to talk (my dad would get a kick out of that).  I get to people watch (my all time favorite thing). It changes every day, so I am rarely bored.  I earn a great salary for the local economy and I am needed

Sometimes though, I get the scary patient.  I find that with certain patients it is like watching a scary movie.  Scary movies are my least favorite but when there is a good one, it makes me want to pee.

I will get up several times during the movie because the tension is so incredible that I have to pee...and if I get to the bathroom and suddenly don't feel like I have to pee, I do anyway to make the trip worth while.  Once when I saw Jurassic Park for the first time I left the theater 4 times!  My older son finally came out looking for me and I was hanging out in the lobby killing time, in case I was gonna have to pee! LOL

So when I get the scary patient I also feel the need to pee.  The scary patient isn't necessarily scary in a dangerous way (they could be) but for me the scary patient is one with a med list a mile long followed by an allergy list that makes you wonder how they live on this planet.  They are the ones who's every waking moment is filled with fear, stress, anger and you are trapped in a small room where you must make them feel safe....then you have to pee.

I wonder what would happen if the scary patient had to first listen to your worries...but there it is...with the patient...you need to be patience.

Julie/Julia/Annie

OK, I know I am somewhat challenged in the cooking area...but I do make great granola and this year a stack of jam...but scones...%^*&

I have to say that if I had 5 people...yes 5...count them, sitting on my kitchen floor giving me a hand with my scones, they may have turned out!

I did buy organic mix scones but was stumped by the requirement of a pastry blender...what the hey is that? So I called my sister who is a premier baker that could make Julia weep in her grave. She described it and it sounded familiar but looking through the cavernous utensil drawer...which included a sushi tool, pizza cutter, rolling pin, various spatulas (I have a spatula fetish and still haven't found a favorite), turkey lifter (be you can't guess what that is), a mallet (looks like a murder weapon) ginger grater, 2 cheese graters, thongs, thermometer, apple corer, cherry pitter and a pile of odds and ends that really don't belong in there...but no pastry thing-a-ma-gig. She said I could us a spoon or fork.

Now you would think using a box mix there could be no failure. NOT. Although not as pretty as the ones my sister makes, they were lightly brown on the bottom and looked edible.

Fast forward to this morning. I serve up my scones to Greg and Connor...a little doughy you say? So what to do...what would any modern day cook do...I nuked them. Now I know that nuking something after baking really makes not sense but what really makes no sense is that after nuking they still tasted doughy, not dry and flaky like my sisters!

Although we all ate one, it was not satisfying...nor did it have the fabulous fresh baked taste. Greg suggested putting them back in the oven??? I decided that to make them flaky I would back them on my pizza tile...well...pizza-scones...both start with flour right?

Amazingly, although totally browned...they still tasted doughy...(*&^%

I'm gonna make me some granola so I can feel good today.

He Said..She Said....What???

This week I have witnesses several events where you have to look below the conversation to really get what is going on. Whether it is frustrations with work, interactions with neighbors or conversations on email. You really have to look between the letters, between the words and between the sentences to understand what is going on...she said what???? he said what????

I have to be careful because I want to know more about what is going on in-between than what is being said. It is important for me to really listen because left to my own devices all I'll hear is yada, yada, yada on the surface but the richness is the stuff between and that isn't really fair to the person who is expressing themselves.

What I know is that this ability or curse comes from my childhood. There were 2 languages spoken in my household. Due to the climate of the times my parents wanted us to assimilate into American society, as quickly and quietly as possible. So the second language was not taught and it was expected that conversations would be in English. But as humans need to converse in their comfort language, the second language which I did not know was spoken frequently when my father was not around. So started my education in reading between the lines, reading body language and over time even though I did not know a word of the language, I began to understand the conversation. Then the understanding of the conversation translated to understanding intent between the conversation....confusing huh!

I do love people watching, I have no problems being stuck at an airport, give me a volatile meeting and my brain is firing like the 4th of July fireworks display.

The things that I have heard this week have fascinated me, because...sure on a work and social level it is interesting but if we as a human race could really understand what is going on with each other, would there be so much negative use of personal energy? Or do we require the negative energy around us, is it useful in a opposite kind of way, does it provide the frame work to understand the good in the world???

For me I can only allow so much negative ions floating around me...but I am interested in understanding it when it does float into my world.

What's Not To Love????

One of my more irritating traits is the fact that I worry. I was born and raised to worry. My early childhood was sporadic, not through any ones fault but it was life at that time. Traveling as a baby to another country, having my mother in and out of hospitals, cared for by strangers...well it makes you hyper vigilant and a worrier.

So for things that are close to my heart I spend more time worrying about...knowing my mother does not care for dogs, thinks they are a waste of time and basically has no use for them. With that said she is no longer MIA but showed up in town yesterday. The scene...dinner at my house...Enzo's first meeting with his grandma. Although the first thing she asked was, "Why did you get a dog?" to which I made no comment, because I knew this dog was going to win her heart. So during dinner he laid at her feet, licking her toes which made her giggle. Then she gave him a pat. Then as he feel asleep on his back with himself exposed she covered him with her napkin?! laughing?!

What's not to love????

In The Blink Of An Eye

In the blink of an eye your life can change. So I ask myself, if tomorrow my life ends up being totally different, what do I want today to be like? I think that a lot of us get caught up in the daily agenda, anger and worries but would we live today with a different outlook if we knew tomorrow may not happen?

I remember being told that no one shows up at the pearly gates saying, "boy, I wish I had worked more." "I wish I had spent more time cleaning my toilets!"

These muses have been a part of my process to decide how I want my life to be lived. There have been several people who I know that have had events in their life which made tomorrow totally different than today. When you go to the gym at 4:30 in the morning you get to know the other crazies who are there. A guy named Dave was driving along with his wife when a car coming in the opposite direction swerved into their lane (a dog jumped in the drivers lap) and they had a head on collision. Luckily, they both survived but not without a totalled truck, and two broken bodies that will require months if not years to recover from. Then last week another gym rat was riding his motorcycle with his wife and a car turned left across their path. Both are in critical condition.

A blink of an eye...life takes a turn. We all know people who's lives have changed dramatically from one day to the next. The question is can a person live their life with the agenda of moving through it as if today was "the day." We are human, but it might make us kinder, more present in the moment. As I hand watered the slope off my deck I would normally been rushing and plotting how to accomplish all that I want in this one day off. But, these thoughts made me slow down and enjoy the process of watering, knowing the plants will grow better for it and laughing as I bathed the squirrels.

Oh by the way, the photo in this blog...This is a picture taken by NASA with the Hubble telescope. They are referring to it as the "Eye of God".

Are You Being Served???

One of our all time favorite Brit Coms was "Are You Being Served" and "Are You Being Served, Again." The initial show centered on a group of employees at a upscale British clothing store. In the second series the group had retired and were living all together in a home left to them by the owner of the store when he died. It required this group of people to learn new skills, like cooking and farming.

I was thinking about this show after reading an article in today's paper titled, "$300,000 a year, but a precarious position." It was chronicling the hardship of the rich in the current economic climate. $500 a month for a gardener, nanny cost $40,000/yr and $75,000 a year in property tax...It seems everyone is feeling it and it is no less distressing for the wealthy than it is for the middle class. It is causing a change in choices, living outside the box so you won't have to live in a box. I have said it before, this downturn was a gift. In all it's stress and difficult choices, if you keep a open outlook you can recognize that the state you are in...is really of your own choice and making.

It has been a time where I have recognized my own...not so smart choices...and have been able to make better ones. I am glad that we did not have to keep up with the Jones' because our children have a better chance of living their lives by their own rules not what society thinks you should have. I was raised a Jones, lol but we lived within, if not below our means. Which has allowed us to weather these times.

I am no longer getting my hair done at my favorite place...because when it comes down to it...do I want to work more to have my hair done there...or do I want more time. Saving has become a religion and my collection box is secure.

Kick It To The Curb

Sometimes you just want to kick life to the curb. I am not one of those people who believe everything good and bad that happens in life is because of god. I do not believe that god is punishing us or challanging us to see if we are worthy. I do not think that all the suffering in the world is happening because we are supposed to learn a lesson.

What I do believe is that life...is life. Filled with choices, challenges, suffering and joy. There are emotional ups and downs, it is our personal choice of what we make of this life...we are not puppets that god is playing with. The god that some people believe in...the one who gives us cancer or plane crashes...well that is not my god.

I like the definition of Life="the course of existence or sum of experiences and actions that constitute a person's existence." Now we have a choice of what kind of life we want and what kind of person we want to be.

It is times where we are faced with some of our most challenging moments that we can decide how we want to play out this exsistence of if we want to be kicked to the curb.