Sometimes, You Are Not What You Wish You Were

I look at this photo and think...this ugly bull dog wishes he were as light as a bee...kinda like me.  There are times I wish I could be realllllly skinny.  The kind where you have to go to the children's dept. to find a pair of jeans that would fit you!

For me, staying a healthy weight requires daily vigilance and sometimes I just don't wanna.  I want to relax already!  Why can't I just be skinny without any effort. But, then I look around me and that is what everyone is doing...talking about their weight, their health...whether they are skinny or not...they are focused on it.

With my genetic background it is a necessary to be vigilant.  I feel better when I am on top of my game...but there are times I wish I could just put on a cute little outfit and transform myself...afterall...this bull dog is dang cute in his little bee outfit!

I wanna Bee Outfit!

Stronger Than Gorilla Glue

This past weekend was a gift.  I was able to witness that which all parents strive for...the bonding of their children.

Parenting is such a humbling experience.  Through your children you get to witness some of your own challenges.  Parenting is like doing a two step.  Two steps forward, one step back.  No one is immune.  There is no perfect parent.  We are human beings with all the challenges of living human...raising other humans.  You do the best you can with your own human frailties tucked in your heart.  You give your children some of your pain and some of your joy.  You give them some of your weaknesses and some of your strengths.  And in the end, you hope that with what you gave them and what they themselves were born with...that they will be better than you.

This weekend gave me the opportunity of seeing one of those gifts.  The kind that Greg and I can tuck in our hearts and know...when we are dead and gone that our children will have each other.  Knowing the bond between our sons is strong and filled with love for each other...well, if we did nothing else right...we did that.  It is stronger than Gorilla Glue.

The other thing you hope for is that who your children choose to spend their lives with, is another person who is bonded to their siblings.  For it is in witnessing this bond that you know their parents for all their humanness gave their children the best of themselves.  I see this in my future daughter in law...she loves her brothers and sisters.  They will understand the need to keep that sibling bond strong and in that bond it will strengthen their own relationship.  When you learn to love, forgive, fight and forgive as you grow up...you take those skills into your own family. 

So, as the world tries to spill some of your cup you have the strength born in the love of your siblings that help you in your own family.

Just Want To Have Fun

We could learn a lot from children.  They don't get wrapped up in what it looks like but how much fun they are having.  Byron is at that inbetween space where he is still able to make believe, have a big belly laugh and be silly...but you can see, that it is beginning to matter how others precieve him.

I wish I could make the silly phase last longer.  Viewing the world through a child is like seeing all the colors in the box...not just the right ones.  It is not worrying about how loud you are laughing...but laughing just for the joy of it!

He looks an inch taller than when I saw him last month...I can see the adult in him...and yet...he loves to play and has not problem pretending he is my favorite pet!  I figure if I keep Bryon instead of Enzo the grooming costs would be less...at least for now and I could start going back to the hair dresser.

I have a feeling though that Byron wouldn't be statisfied with the same dog food every day.  But, I do know that Enzo would love to share his bed with his boy.

FATE

Definitions of fate on the Web:

destiny: an event (or a course of events) that will inevitably happen in the future

destiny: the ultimate agency regarded as predetermining the course of events (often personified as a woman); "we are helpless in the face of destiny"

destine: decree or designate beforehand; "She was destined to become a great pianist"

fortune: your overall circumstances or condition in life (including everything that happens to you); "whatever my fortune may be"; "deserved a better fate"; "has a happy lot"; "the luck of the Irish"; "a victim of circumstances"; "success that was her portion"

 

After an indepth...margarita induced discussion on fate, I have a more concrete personal definition.  I believe that in life, fate exsists...but it has no power, no control in and of itself.  It is like lines on a road map.  You are standing on point A and before you there are many choices.  Fate cannot exsist without choice.  They are like 2 important ingredients in a recipe.  What ever direction you choose, you will understand the fate that was involved...only if you are willing to see the fate and accept that it is a result of your choice.

 

There are many ways to live a life. One based totally on choice, gives you the total responsibility for it's outcome.  Some are not strong enough for this path.  Choosing a life based only destiny is to give up all responsibility.  But to stand on the point and have before you many choices, choosing one and knowing that it was not your only choice but the outcome will be different with each choice...you see can see the hand of fate.  Fate cannot exsist without choice.  Most people cannot see fate because they do not want to accept that their choice resulted in this fate.

 

Fate has been given a bad rap because orgainzed religion has twisted it's defintion to suit their individual doctrine.  It has taken on a negative aura.

 

BUT...

 

Fate is the whisper of a miracle.  It is a force of nature to create vivid color in our lives.  Fate can give you the gift of power over your choices OR is it that your choices give you power over your fate?

21 Things We're Learning to Live Without!

Monthly payments

Window shopping

Bells and Whistles

Clutter

Cable TV

A Home Phone

Privacy

Prepared Food

Tupperware Parties

Packaged Cigarettes

Lattes

Guilt

Extra Calories

Newspapers and Magazines

Healthcare

New Gifts

New Cars

Comfort

A Daily Commute

Fancy Dates

Debt

It is amazing how dramatic the world has changed.  When I was growing up this list was the norm...not something we gave up.  I used to roll my dad's cigarettes.  My parents never went out on dates...and it wasn't until I was away at college that my dad bought his first brand new car.  There was never any privacy as we always had people moving in and out of our home.  That was how you gave a leg up to a family member.  Regifting...was an art form.

Now this list came out as if these were things that one could not live without but now are forced to...Interesting times we live in....

Stunt Dog

Ok, so I was trying to ride the wind...we were only going 10-15 miles an hour around the round-a-bout on Newport and I was hanging my head out the back door window and got a little dizzy.  The window was not even rolled all the way down...but the wind, the sun...well it was intoxicating...and so, I fell out.

That's right!  I fell out the window while my human pet was driving around the round-a-bout...on Newport!  I let a yelp out as I hit the road and did a tuck and roll.  There were lots of cars behind us since it was around 4 PM and I know I scared the Sh$%^ out of my human pet because she filped a U turn in the middle of Newport. 

I was soooo scared that I ran to the middle of the round-a-bout and sat down.  Holy #$%^!

She stopped her car in the middle of Newport, came running up to me...when I saw her I almost pee'd my fur...I was so scared and happy to see her....she grabbed my collar and took me to the car.  Traffic was backed up in the round-a-bout but I could tell she could have cared less.

She was as freaked as I was!  Then she pulled forward and pulled off, made me jump in and out of the car to see if I was OK...then we sped to the Vets office.  On the way I was so freaked out, I threw up twice in the car...which freaked her out even more and she almost rear ended a car in front of us.  We reached the vets office and they stuck a thermometer up my rear...what does that have to do with my sore hip??? looked in my eyes, felt me up...I think the vet is kinda kinky and let my human pet put her head on his shoulder and say she was freaked out!  Then the vet told her he had a dog fall out of his car going 50!  Thank god for the round-a-bouts!

I think if this economy keeps going down and I need to get a job...I'll try to be a stunt double!

Oh Boy...Did I Have A Brain Fart!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJQM5xBaRXI&feature=related

Click on this link...these are friends of Enzo's

As if this allergy thing hasn't created havoc in my life already...but just this morning at spin class I realized I forgot some very special birthdays!

Last week, I forgot Dale's birthday, Irene's birthday and Big Birds birthday!  Who knows what might happen this week!

I am sorry because when I am forgotten by someone, it feels like you are not important in their lives...and these three people mean so much to me!

Obviously I totally blame it on my allergies...not on the fact that I am getting older.

I love you guys!!!!!!!!!

 

Cold ~ Rainy...Yeahhhh!

It is funny how desperate you can be for those first days of Spring when you are in the throws of winter.  You watch the flakes drop...floating and blowing around and you dream of a spring day where the flowers are starting to bud and the landscape is turning a wonderful shade of green.

As you sip your hot tea with many layers of clothing to keep the chill away...you dream of the sun beating down on your yard, forcing growth.  While shoveling snow you wish for that moment you can pull your first weed.  You crave those joyful moments when you can run out and buy flats of flowers to plant!

Then, the beginning of Spring arrives and you get a taste of warm days to come.  NOOOOO...that also means the Junipers, Birches and Pines start their yearly cycle...spreading their pollen across the land.

Now, you welcome the cold and the wet because it dampens down the pollen and allows you to breath.

Wishing ~ Hoping ~ Getting ~ Excepting ~ Wishing ~ Hoping ~ Getting ~ Excepting...and so it goes around.

Cup Half Full ~ Cup Half Empty

I look at this photo and I wonder is this guy a "cup half full or a cup half empty kinda guy?" Is he looking at this situation as "the ride of his life or is he thinking this is my last ride?"

Life is challenging and having your cup half full can keep you from freaking out!  Especially when you have a wedding in your horizon. The logistics of pulling a wedding off are huge...hence, wedding planners, books about wedding planning and movies about wedding planners.  This is like having a little angel on your shoulder whispering...do this, do that...but no planning in the world can keep life at bay, the human factor.  Showing up to a wedding is not only the food, the cake, the dress, the decor...but people, with their individual needs, wants and dreams.

I was talking to a patient about her medical history last week and she spent the 24 hours before her daughter's wedding in the hosptial...being monitored for a possible heart attack???!!!!  I thought holy @#$% her daughter must have been freaked!  But, if you are a cup half full kind of person...who for the most part carries a little joy where ever you go...you already have an innate knowledge that you can deal with the disappointments that happen every time humans gather.

Yesterday a friend and I spent the afternoon looking for the little items needed for weddings.  We are both mother's of the groom.  So this little adventure was fun in ways we didn't anticipate.  As we shopped, discussed details and dreamed of the perfect items needed, there was the conversation about our own weddings, that life happens and at this stage of the game we both don't remember all the disappointments or disasters (and there were some) heck, my stalker showed up to my wedding...but only memory of the joy in tying the knot with the love of my life.

I hope my children carry the cup half full, because life is what it is...always trying to get you to spill a little of your cup.  But, if you remember that there are two of you holding onto the cup...you are stronger.

Procrastinate Now, Don't Put It Off

I used to study the art of procrastination.  I was very good at it and became known in my family as the princess of procrastination.  I remember my sister one birthday gave me a note pad that said at the top of each page...Procrastinator's List Of Things To Do.

I am not sure if it was a gift or a slam.  I remember thinking it didn't feel so good having a title like that.  What I have learned in the years to follow is that procrastination isn't so bad when you dose it.  You will recognize when procrastinating feels good and when it feels bad.  Spending time with your children...love ones...rather than vaccuming...yeah...that is way good procrastination.  Getting your taxes together on April 14th...bad procrastination.  Over the years I have figured out the best procrastination and the worst procrastinations.  Not paying bills on time...bad procrastination...taking the dog for a walk instead of laundry...good procrastination.

It is that fine balance and I can now say that I am the Queen of Procrastination.  I have fine tuned the procrastinator's life and no longer need a note pad...for I have the best of times and the worst of times procrastinating within my power!

You Got Mail!!!!

I could not believe it but my human pet handed me some mail!  I received a thank you card for a gift I sent to Sarah's bridal shower.  I know...I am a great dog...even though I did not receive an invitation I still went shopping and picked out a present.

I loved the card, it had colorful dots on it that looked like my doggy treats!

I carried it around for while showing off to my friends in the neighborhood.  I got mail!

I do have some reservations about getting my first letter.  I wonder if I'll start getting junk mail, or a voters pamphlet...those look boring.

I know there is no draft, but what if I have to register for the draft just in case.  I will have to lie low for a while because once you are on the radar...well I don't want my identity to be scammed!

Possessed

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzRH3iTQPrk

You have to watch the video linked above...cracked me up!  My blog today is dedicated to the practice of sneezing.

  "The function of sneezing is to expel mucus containing foreign particles or irritants and cleanse the nasal cavity. During a sneeze, the soft palate and uvula depress while the back of the tongue elevates to partially close the passage to the mouth so that air ejected from the lungs may be expelled through the nose. Because the closing of the mouth is partial, a considerable amount of this air is usually also expelled from the mouth. The force and extent of the expulsion of the air through the nose varies."

In Ancient Greece, sneezes were believed to be prophetic signs from the gods.

In Europe, principally around the early Middle Ages, it was believed that one's life was in fact tied to one's breath - a belief reflected in the word "expire" (originally meaning "to exhale") gaining the additional meaning of "to come to an end" or "to die". This connection, coupled with the significant amount of breath expelled from the body during a sneeze, had likely[citation needed] led people to believe that sneezing could easily be fatal.

In certain parts of Eastern Asia, particularly in Japanese culture and Vietnamese culture, a sneeze without an obvious cause was generally perceived as a sign that someone was talking about the sneezer at that very moment

In the Seinfeld episode The Good Samaritan, Jerry proposes that one should say "You're so good looking!" in response to a sneeze in lieu of "God Bless You."

What I can say about the last 48 hours is that according to the research...the gods have given me a sign that I have died and come back to life at least several hundred times and that a whole bunch of people have been talking about me and of course that, I am really good looking.

AAAA....choooo

Well, its that time of year...allergy season.  I am an allergy sufferer of the most profound.  On Monday at 4:00 PM I sneezed...then sneezed again...and sneezed an additional 20 times.  Arrrgggh.  Within an hour I needed allergy medicine and the season began.

The worst part of allergy season for me is my brain stops working.  Normally it can handle several tasks at the same time.  During allergy season, I am lucky to remember my name and those of my family members...forget remembering my phone number.

I become "cautions Annie."  It is during this season that I can only do one thing at a time, I must write myself notes and I have to be careful what I do...because it is during this season I will fall down, trip, stab myself (accidently), get lost, forget where I parked my car and will generally slip into a fugue state.

It is caused by the number of medications that are required to control the symptoms, the lack of oxygen caused my 50 sneezes in a row if I don't take medicaiton and the totally exhaustion caused by the lack of sleep, itcy throat, plugged ears, runny nose...well you get it.

Greg try to make me feel better...he is sympathetic, because after 33 years of this yearly cycle he knows...I may call him for a ride cause I can't find my car.

So off to work I go, knowing my process will be shorter cause I'll have to write everything down.  I'll have to explain to each patient..."No, I do not have a cold...this water fall is because of the snow melt! lol" 

All I can say at this point is....AAAA....Chooooo

Platitudes

"A platitude is a trite, meaningless, biased, or prosaic statement that is presented as if it were significant and original. The word derives from plat, the French word for "flat." Whether any given statement is considered to have meaning is highly subjective, so platitude is often—but not always—used as a pejorative term to describe seemingly profound statements that a certain person views as unoriginal or shallow. An example of a platitude is "go with the flow" or "a rule is a rule."

I started thinking about platitudes and how tired I am of them, when I was in line waiting my turn at a local store...the conversation between the clerk and the customer went like this....

"How ya doin' Becky?"

"I'm putting one foot in front of the other.  Had to move out of my rental."

"Gotta keep your head up."

"Life is what it is."

"When life gives you lemons, you gotta make lemonade."

Holy @#$%.  Was anything said?  Did anyone walk away from this conversation feeling better?  Did they really hear what each person was saying?

I am as guilty as the next person of interjecting a platitude into a conversation but we have got to stop this...it's a disease now!  People aren't really listening to each other but are speaking in trite platitudes, buzzwords and jargon.  They are not having heart felt conversations and taking the time to hear what we are saying...

So, if I were to interpret the above conversation and hear what is really being said...

"How ya doin' Becky?"
"I had to move out of my rental and am trying to figure out where I'm going to live."
"I'm sorry to hear that, it must be stressful."
" ya, sometimes life can be hard."
" Well, you've always been a positive person and I am sure you will find a place soon."

Two people, hearing each other, connecting...or you could just going on saying, platitudes..."that's what makes the world go round."

Bless Me Father For I Have Sinned....

There is no question about it...confession is therapeutic.   Confessional web sites have been springing up all over the net.  Some are used by people just for the shock value, some are to apologize for criminal acts and some are for misdeeds committed years ago.

We as a society like to present an view that every thing is A-OK.  We don't want to bare our souls to co-workers or friends and the anonymity of these on-line sites allows people too wash their "sins" away.

I don't get it and I don't agree.  Saying your are sorry does nothing if it is not directed to the person who is harmed.  Confessing you feel bad just to make yourself feel better is pointless.  And the idea that one could be forgiven any transgression by confession either in a confessional or an internet confessional...well it's delusional.

In order to grow as a person, one of the traits that you have to develop as a human being is the ability to know when you are wrong, be able to apologize directly for the misdeed and gain the knowledge of how to not do it again. Then you have a confession that has substance.  If you have never apologized for a past misdeed and there is either no opportunity to make it right by distance or death, you can still learn from that event, never repeating the mistake and become a better person.

There are people we hurt that we can never apologize too for a variety of reasons...but why confess to an internet site...why not just work at becoming a kinder person.  The world needs more honest, kinder people.

I'm A 5 Star Dog!

Most humans don't consider the Embassy Suites a 5 star hotel...but from a dogs point of view...it earned every star.  I had a great time in Portland visiting my human brother's and their loved ones...best of all...I got to live in the lap of dog heaven.

In the morning I would head down the elevator...what a wild ride.  Of course as soon as I stepped on my fans would all want to pet me.  I made sure they had clean hands by licking them first.

By getting up early I was first in line for a cup 'o java!  Gotta have that morning boost!

What can I say but we all have out addicitons!  Before the crowd got to the business center I checked my stock portfolio to make sure my business manager is investing my money in the right dog food funds.

Then it was time for dip in the pooool!  But I got caught by some maintenance guy.  I was ready to jump but he looked like he would have a hard time swimming and I didn't want to be responsible for him drowning.

So I went back up to the room and

called room service.

I really wanted a nice burger but had a hard time communicating with the room service person.  English was their second language...I totally get how hard it is for people to understand when you're trying to get your point across...so I ended up with another cup of java.

My human pets got PO'd when they saw me drinking this $5 bottle of water...but hey...you can't expect me to drink the tap water now...could you.

When the bill was slid under the door I had some explaining to do...I swear I did not order the "Homeward Bound" movie on pay for view....

It was a great trip, especially seeing my boy, Byron...he totally cracks me up!

Outta My Way...

photo by Connor Bates

Spring has sprung in Portland and although by checking the TripCheck cam of the passes...and we have to drive through snow covered road...we are heading to Portland to revel in the beauty of Spring!

I checked Portland's cams and so far it is not raining where either Peter and his family or Connor are living.  So it could be a totally awesome day.  Of course any day we get to change the pattern of our living always feels good.  This year is providing me with many shake up moments and I like it like that!

My favorite things in Portland, Connor, Peter, Sarah, Byron, Powell's bookstore, Sur La Table kitchen shop, Fabric Depot, Bijou Cafe....wonder how many of these things I will see....

The Weight Of The Day

Connor's Foot

I knew when I took this photo over a year ago it would be needed someday.  Today is that day.  I am blogging about my feet and his are more photogenic.  Yesterday I was working in the OR holding all day.  Patients in and patients out.  Prepping for surgery, gown on, ted hose on, IV started, their clothing packed away, charting done...all of this while standing.  By the time the afternoon rolled around I was still rolling on like a tumble weed.  The only part of my body that was putting up a fuss was the bottom of my feet.

My head was OK.  My back had no complaints and even though I had entered a bible's worth of information into a laptop, my wrist and hands were still flying.  My legs were happy wrapped in my support stockings...but my feet...they were screaming!

By late afternoon I started sittting down between patients just to shut them up (not the patients but my feet).  Then when I get home Greg and I are standing around the kitchen, sharing the days happenings, when my feet say, "alright already! take a load off."  Ahhhhh, kick back in my chair and they start relaxing.

This morning they are still talking, but in a whisper...and this I realize...that our poor feet take the brunt of every choice we make...of every activity we participate in and for every cute shoe we want to wear.

And although I sympathize with my feet I have had to give them a "come to jesus" talk and say..."hey, your life could be so much worse!"

Dream A Little Dream....

This has been one weird winter.  First we get a dump load of snow which melted in a nano second and then we have had months of on again off again spring weather in the middle of winter.  My iris's are already sprouting and they are wondering what the heck is going on.

I so love to experience winter...the kind of winter where you need your snow shoes to go get your mail.  Instead I have had a winter that is more reflective of Portland.

The unreasonable part of this kind of winter is that when it happens in Central Oregon you absolutely do not get flowers.  Unlike Portland that is in full blooms.  Instead you get plants that are struggling to decided...should I sprout or should  remain dormant.

I am ready to get off this merry go round and head to Portland this weekend.  Because apparently they are really experiencing Spring!

photo by Connor Bates

So today I dream a little dream of flowers and herbs growing.  The scent of them riding the wave of a gentle wind...fulfilling a need to smell the scents that give bloom to love.

Tax Day, The Sequel

OK, so yesterday I met with the tax preparer.  I had all my paperwork in a gallon size freezer bag.  I figured since I didn't know this person at all...I might as well be transparent.

Right away the receptionist tells me my "Billie" who has been doing my taxes for over 10 years is in ICU!  Ok, now I feel bad about wanting to start her IV so she could do my taxes.  They asked if I wanted to sign a big card for her and...of course I did.  I asked if she was taking any visitors and they said yes but it is restricted.  Today I will find out if I can see her.  I am not sure it is a good thing since I will be working and may start crying.  But, when someone has been an important part of orgainzing your life you need to take a moment and be there for them.

The new person was pleasant, efficient and didn't even blink when I put my clear gallon size freezer bag on the desk.  The process was fairly painless but the outcome...well it always takes my breath away.  To live a decent life, debtless, means you will pay every April 15th.  Such a burn, but at the same time I have to look at the fact that we both have great careers, we live comfortably, we are not in debt and we can pay our taxes...even though it means we won't be going on a cruise to someplace warm.

Our vacations this year will be to Portland but hey, everyone we love is in Portland!  And so another tax year is done for us and although we had a couple of gin and tonics with dinner...we are ready to start the cycle over again...the bottom line...I love my country, I love my career, I love my family, I love where I live...so what else is there?

Tax Day

I usually wait to meet with the tax preparer in April.  I try to be in denial until then.  What I have learned about myself is that on Jan. 2 I can feel it out there...much like you know something is watching you through the trees when you're outside at night.  When Feb. rolls around...I start fretting, ever so slightly.  By March  I am in full swing, getting orgainized in my head only.  Then April comes and I start needing my inhaler.  But it usually is the day before I have my meeting that I actually start pulling things out.  Inevitably I forget something and I am calling Greg from my meeting asking him questions.  Then I say, "I'll look for that and get back to you" and the preparer rolls her eyes lovingly and set up a second appointment.

This year is different...well, a little different in someways and really different in others.  Because of an exciting impending wedding I have decided it is best to do our taxes earlier...we always...I mean, always have to pay.  Some years less than others but it is always painful.  I just wanted it out of the way...I didn't want to be fretting about money and I didn't want my emotional issue with tax time to be anywhere near the time of the wedding.  I always drop the taxes in the mail April 14th but that is only 3 weeks before the wedding!  No way, I needed it to be weeks before...

So, today is my meeting with the tax preparer.  The difference in the last few years is that I have a drawer where I dump everything all year long that has to do with taxes, then when I have to get orgainized at least it is all in one spot...not like the year Greg had to get a new copy of his W2 the week before because I couldn't find it!  Secondly, I have the same person do it every year.  For years it was the grandfather of one of Connor's classmates...then he retired!  He passed me onto the woman who bought his business...and she has been doing our taxes for over 10 years!  They totally got me...they never blinked twice when I show up with all the papers in a Victoria Secret bag or stuffed into a tupperware container....but today whaaaaaaaaa...I see a new person.  Someone who doesn't know me from squat because my 'ol tax preparer is sick!  It sounds like a bad kind of sick...she was old but I swear I could have started an IV on her while she did my taxes!!!!  She has known us for so long that she would ask how my kids were?...am I still quilting?...what I ate for breakfast this morning?  I knew her so well from our conversations that I could ask about her sister...her grandkids...but today I meet someone new!

Today I meet someone that I have to charm and hope she gets me when I show up with a pile of loose papers, that I am a smart competent professional, who loves to quilt...who's favorite restuarant is El Cap, who is madly in love with her husband...who thinks her children walk on water...I hope she get me...or Huston...we have a problem!

Cross Dressing

Japanese Cops Are Cross Dressing

Patrolling in high heels, wigs and designer bags, Japanese black-belt policemen have been cross-dressing in a bid to beat off bag-snatchers, a report said Wednesday.

The all-male squad has been deployed since last month on night patrols in central Aichi prefecture, wearing skirts and stockings and carrying eye-catching handbags as bait for potential thieves, the Asahi daily reported.

So far the unit has failed to nab any muggers, the Asahi said, and Aichi police declined to comment on the report.

To qualify for the special squad, police have to be young, slim and hold the top rank of a black belt in a martial art such as karate or judo, the report said.

A 26-year-old officer -- measuring 1.71 metres (5.6 feet) in height and weighing in at a dainty 61 kilograms (134 pounds) -- expressed pride in the mission, telling the daily: "It's cowardly to target women who are weak."

So, you wonder about this sudden interest in men who cross dress?  Well, yesterday I saw something that caused me to drop my mouth open...not even hiding my astonishment.  For those who live in Bend, Oregon...as with other places in the world we have our peculiar citizens.  There was the guy who dressed in all black, long flowing coat, with a katana strapped to his back riding a bicycle with a long black beard.  One day a nude woman dressed in only cowboy boots was riding her bike around town...and then there is Frank.

Frank is a gulf war vet, receives VA benefits and I am sure has not had a shower since the war.  He drives around town in a convertable with all kinds of junk hanging out of his car and the hood has several items glued to the surface.  Sometimes he has a manquin with him and all of the time he has 2 dogs and one cat on a leash.  He parks himself and his animals in front of a variety of coffee shops and plays his guitar with a money jar for donations.  He is disheveled and just plain dirty...as is his car, which is now taped together cause someone ran into the back end.  Although startling for tourists...occassionally you will see a mother run her young son into a store to avoid passing Frank...he is harmless...I think.

I say I think...because today I saw another side of Frank and I saw way more of Frank than I ever wanted too.

As he drove up his convertable top was closed...hummm...rain or shine it is always open.  When he parked and opened it up and rose out of his car in all his glory...I swear, my mouth dropped open.  He is one big man...at least 6'5 but when he stood up and walk around in his mini dress, opened to the waist with his chest hairs flowing in all their glory,  his fishnet stocking and the largest pair of clogs I have ever seen, embedded with rhinestones.  I almost inhaled my coffee.  To top off this ensemble his hair was spiked with blue dye, a bucket load of makeup and enough jewels to make the Queen envious. I swear a man wearing red lipstick with a couple days worth of facial hair growth is not a pretty sight!

Although he will always make an entrance no matter where he goes...today the group of people who stopped for coffee after church and saw him...well that moment was priceless.

Black Horse Saloon

Last night was a interesting step into a life that is not familiar to me.  One of my best friends got a "bee in her bonnet"...yes we are old enough to say that and understand it's meaning.  Robin decided she had never been to the Black Horse Saloon and there were a couple of country music singers performing there...and she really wanted to go.  She looks left, she looks right and she looks behind her...and who should always have her back...Lori and I.  I drug out my consent for a week...Lori tried to get a cold...but there we were not only sitting in the black horse but eating there also. 

Although I can't say it was the best time I ever had, it did give me some great people watching and I realized that as a human being...it is really hard to give up on your judgements.  Thus I learned that there really is an argument for infertility. 

The week before she was trying to convince me that The Black Horse Saloon was a restaurant.  Well, I know and every one else we know...gets, that it is a bar.  The interesting part is that this bar has morphed.  I remember that for years the Black Horse was a biker bar and although there are remnants of biker memorabilia...I acutally only saw 3 people who would qualify as bikers.  2 of them had long grey ponytails and were older than dirt.  The rest were a hodge podge of humanity.  A majority were in our age group 50-60 yrs.  Then a small sample of the 40 year old group and a little larger portion were the 20-30 year olds.  Scattered amoungst the rest were only a handful of 70+ single males...as in I showed up by myself to find someone who will take care of me and I left my hearing aids at home so I wouldn't have to listen to the noise.

I am not a country western fan.  That's in, I am not a country western fan period.  My girlfriends tell me that it's because I was never raised country.  I am totally Ferigilicious!  LOL  It appears that the Black Horse is no longer a biker bar but a country bar, a skater bar and a brew pub all rolled into one.  Microbrew on tap and long skateboard on the wall and when a guy walked by with a spiked up mohawk...I think the economy has forced the biker bar to diversify.  Being a restless type I had to get up and move around, partake in some enjoyable people watching...and boy did I get to watch some peeps.

There was the couple who really...just needed to go to the Rainbow Motel.  There was the girl with the very fake breasts who was stalking a new wallet and found one...saw her leave with a cowboy in tow.  Bad hair day people, lots of regular couples like Greg and I...oh yeah, although Greg was invited he stayed home and lucky for him...not his style.  There was an elderly couple who looked like they were dressed for church. Lots of people who looked like they had been eating too much bar food, weight watchers here I come.  People playing pool on what looked like midget pool tables...video poker, which I tried and lost 2 bucks and so I kicked the machine...I was being channeled by a biker chick and what really made me think that this is not a place for me...the menu, although listing 2 desserts does not serve any dessert, of any kind...no ice cream...if you want something sweet they have two of those old time candy machines where you put in a quarter, hold your hand  below the opening and a handfull of M&M's roll out.

So, what did I learn about my adventure to a bar?  I really love my girlfriends and would do anything for them.  There are things in this world still to experience.  I can feel discomfort and should occasionally.  I still don't like country music.  This definately is not a place for a woman to look for her life mate. Just because you think it's a biker bar, it may not be.  Some clothing should not be worn by women our age.  Video poker is a total waste of $2.  Never go to a bar that won't give you ice cream.  I am married to the most wonderful man on the earth! 

Overall I had an interesting time and although The Black Horse Saloon was not on my life list, I can cross it off.

Happy People Tend To Talk More Than Unhappy People!

Mrs. Rosenthal...yay, I'm taling to you!  Remember you were the one who put tape over my mouth most of my first grade year...You were the one that wrote on my report card that I was mentally retarded because of my mixed blood...SUCCESS is the sweetest revenge!  Guess what?  That roll of tape that had my name on it...I'm still HAPPY and now they say happy people talk more than unhappy people!  I am the happiest person in the world!!!!!!!!

Here is the full article...very fun reading...maybe we can discuss it...I sure like talking about it! LOL

Happy people tend to talk more than unhappy people, but when they do, it tends to be less small talk and more substance, a new study finds.

A group of psychologists from the University of Arizona and Washington University in St. Louis set out to find whether happy and unhappy people differ in the types of conversations they tend to have.

For their study, volunteers wore an unobtrusive recording device called the Electronically Activated Recorder (EAR) over four days. The device periodically records snippets of sounds as participants go about their lives.

For this experiment, the EAR sampled 30 seconds of sounds every 12.5 minutes yielding a total of more than 20,000 recordings.

Researchers then listened to the recordings and identified the conversations as trivial small talk or substantive discussions. In addition, the volunteers completed personality and well-being assessments.

Here's what the researchers found:

• The happiest participants spent 25 percent less time alone and 70 percent more time talking than the unhappiest participants.

• The happiest participants also had twice as many substantive conversations and one-third as much small talk as the unhappiest participants.

The findings, to be detailed in an upcoming issue of the journal Psychological Science, suggest that happy lives are social and conversationally deep, rather than solitary and superficial.

The researchers think that deep conversations may have the potential to make people happier, though the findings from this study don't identify cause-and-effect between the two.

Humble Pie

There have been times where I have been in a situation where I have told the person I am with that, humilty is a good thing.  I think the world has a way of eventually balancing out life and those with a little bit of humility don't feel the shift quite as sharply.

Most of my working life has been at the side of physicians.  In my opinion they have one of the hardest professions.  To look at each individual human being...figure out what ails them...process the information and come up with the best solution.  Doing this while they themselves have spouses who need them, children who are challenging them and keeping up with the ever changing world of medicine.

What I do think would help them is a slice of humble pie.  I have noticed that most don't eat humble pie.  They think that they have found the recipe, mixed the ingredients, bake it...and thus do not need to eat a slice.

When you eat a slice of humble pie each day, it gives you a different view of the people you meet.  Humble pie makes your hearing more acute.  Your heart is more loving and those around you can tell you have had your slice of pie.

Those who chose not to ever eat a slice of humble pie, can't hear what you are saying (because they are always right), they walk and carry their bodies so as to keep a boundary line around their hearts and brains.  When they make a mistake they fall the hardest and usually try to blame someone else, the nurse, they system, the health care industry....yada yada yada.

I try to share my pie with whoever I work with...it taste good and it makes you a better nurse.

Revenge...The Best Feeling In My Little Doggie Heart!

Well, it was freezing cold yesterday, with a combination of rain, wind and snow.  Because of my stupid haircut I had to stay inside all day.  I would much rather go out on the deck and taunt the stupid squirrels.  They throw pine cones at me...but I catch them in my teeth and spit them back at them!

As revenge when my female human got home I bounced around with excitement and then promptly threw up on the rug...ah ha!  I have revenge!  Forcing her to clean up my mess! 

Since I was totally bored today I spent time trying on this pink hat...I actually think it may get me a cover shot on Dog World.

I am still trying to decide what look to go for...skater dog, gang banger dog...French dog...hey I am a French dog or blue collar dog??

I think no matter how I wear this hat...I am one dammm fine specimen!

I may not give the human this hat back...I look better wearing it than her and she sooooo owes me!

          

I think for a while longer I am going to ignore her...she needs to pay....sooooo bad.  It is hard for me to stay mad at her, she loves me soooo.  Today I shall wear a jacket to go on my walk and this hat...who's S E X Y now.

BAAADDDD Hair Day

My name is Enzo and I have taken over this blog!  I usually love going to the hairdresser and they love seeing me...but get real this cut does nothing for my spectacular profile. 

When I show up they usually ask my human how short the cut should be...does she not know it is still WINTER!  I pranced around, shaking hands trying to make the "help" want to take care of me.  I heard the human say to the groomer that I was like a piece of VELCRO and that it takes her an hour after our walks  to get the sticker weeds out of my magnificent coat.  I should have paid more attention...for little did I know that that would mean they would cut all my hair off!!! @#$%^

Now I am going to freeze to death, male human #2 that lives in MY house started laughing as soon as he saw me...and then said...how did this happen.

I look like an alien, with 2 giant pom poms on the side of my head...and this appearance makes me look like I have a small brain!  I do have to say that when I was getting my hair cut there were at least 20 people watching through the window...I am beautiful and they needed to see me...what PO's me is that not one of them rapped on the window and told the "help" that they were cutting my hair to short!

Both humans have to go to work today...I may display my displeasure at this grooming while they are gone!