Ocularendoritis

As described to me in my spinning class by a fellow spinner...it is where the ocular nerve migrates through the body and wraps itself around your colon giving you a shitty view on life.

I think 2008 was filled with people suffering from this malady. There has yet to be a vaccine developed to prevent the migration of the nerve, but the Mayo Clinic has released 10 steps you can take to boost your immune system....

1. get your endorphins pumping any way you can
2. eat whole foods (a few less pounds feels better)
3. limit caffeine to no more than 2 cups a day (more an you may be tempted to read the paper)
4. smile at each person you pass (it will boost their immune system)
5. Try something new (it has to be legal, because if you have looked at mug shots...all of them have the disease)
6. pay yourself first (keep putting money in your savings account...it is addicting)
7. read a good book
8. watch an animated movie (listening to the kids in the theater is a boost)
9. whenever the sun is out..go outside and face it like a sunflower.

and last but not least...

10. make love with the lights off, you feel so much more beautiful.

The CDC hopes to have a vaccine for the ocularendoritis disease by 2010...so hang in there.