Love From A Distance

I realized last night in my dreams why I was having to hold a note of happiness in my hand as a reminder of how happy I am. I couldn't figure it out. By last night I gave up and just relaxed about it...which allowed me to put down the note.

It was my dream...that gave me the clue. There are those people in our lives that we want to love from a distance. I truly love my "long distance love" but if they get too close I get burned. It is like you have to wear a hazmat suit so you can see their love but not feel the pain that can come with it...

And so there is this constant cycle of love, fear, guilt. It is kind of funny because in my dream the character changed their mind and decided to keep some distance and I was so happy and filled with love for them...at the very least I now know what was bugging me yesterday, it was the safety zone of my brain trying to let me know...there is hard love coming.