Motherhood is a life time job. For me it is not a job but a gift. Motherhood made me a better person, challenging me to look outside myself and be amazed at what I see.
Spending time yesterday with my sons was a way to see how much and how little the effect of motherhood has on the baby. I know, sounds confusing...but you can see the decisions you made as a mother, the type of relationship you have with your children can make a huge difference to them as adults...and at the same time, you can see how little your effect is and how strong their own personalities and world experiences make up who they are.
What is always wonderful to observe is what a loving mother our Sarah is with her son. You are a clean slate at birth but through the development of our own personalities, the influence of our family, you end up wih the loving gene or not...and she definately has the loving gene. Which as I see it benefits her own son, but also my son. Because no matter how old the boy is, no matter who he is in relationship with, they always need a little mothering and we also sometimes need a little fathering. We like to think our grown up relationships don't require a mother or father but in fact you get that warm fuzzy feeling when someone fixes your lunch or makes sure you are OK. It is a little dab of mothering and fathering that we never forget.
I remember when my mother in law was passing on...one foot in this world, one foot out of this world...I wanted her to feel the warmth of mothering, that someone loved her no matter what...so I sat with her, stroking her arm and telling her what a wonderful gift she gave to this world when she had her son and thereby her grandson's. Motherhood is a gift from beginning to end.
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